Yo, Mitch come on over here. Just want to let you know, don’t worry about that whole molester Roy (creepy) Moore. Alabama has got your back. Well, not really, we have OUR back. The back, like in Alabama. From Mobile to Huntsville, from Etowah County to Jefferson County and all the towns and counties in between. We don’t need your help, or opinion, or your grand (actual shitty) ideas. K?
Alabama knows what it’s doing. Yeah, we may be south, and slow talking, but seriously, we got this for real. Here is what we got. Real people on the ground in Alabama working their behinds off to get Doug Jones elected as the next Senator from Alabama.
Etowah County is not Jefferson County. Not even close. Alabama is not unique, it is just an another place where folks live, and work, and vote for the candidate of their choice. Mitch, you chose your horse, and he LOST. So just chill out and accept the inevitable, Roy Moore will win or lose on his own. Without your crappy opinion or money or power. Because here’s the thing, in Alabama, Mitchy, you ain’t got a horse in this race. This is ours to fuck up or not.
Doug Jones campaign signs are popping up everywhere like mushrooms after a warm spring rain. That’s right Turtle-man, the signs are everywhere. Not a pervy Moore sign to seen anywhere. This may be the year where Alabama rises from the racist ashes of the past and elects a real Democrat.
Not just a place holder like the guy you chose Mitchy-poo. But a for real decent man, who is on the right side of history. You would think we would all want that outcome. But nooooo, Mr. Turtle-pants, you wanted to pick the next senator from Alabama. So bugger off and go about your business of passing giant tax cuts for your buddies, and screwing over the masses. Alabama gets it, we are too damn stupid and slow to decide our own destiny.
But here’s the thing Mitch McConnell, Big Pants Senate Majority Leader. You have no control over the good people of Alabama. Most folks don’t even like you around these parts, hell, some even curse your name and wish you back to the swamp you crawled out of long long ago. Let us get out the vote for the December 12th special election for US Senator, send our silly postcards for Doug Jones for senate. Phone bank, go door to door, because more and more folks are jumping on board to help turn the tide blue, very blue, and elect the best candidate. That person is Doug Jones. Mitch, you know it, I know it, the whole country knows it. Even the GOP knows it.
Check out Doug Jones, donate or volunteer.
Check out the postcards to voters campaign.
So in closing dear Mr. McConnell, go on home, slip into your warm comfortable swamp, and just hush up.